Mann's Generation Mann Catspicious
by A. Mann
Summary: Mann Catspicious... aka The Wrath of Spot 1. After the weird alien visited, people are still a little crazy and Mann lets all the cats go free. Then because of some other stuff, Picard leads a chase to regain control of the Enterprise.


**Mann's Generation **

**Mann Catspicious / The Wrath of Spot 1**

**Season six**

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* * *

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Counselor's Log, a visit from a weird alien has left the crew unsettled, it was similar to the Vulcan Sybok, it put people in touch with feelings they've been reluctant to express… Mostly caveman instincts and stuff, but it's impact went a little higher, since intelligent dialogue was created in the effort to get rid of it. ...I hate vanilla ice cream! I really hate it! And I hate to wear anything revealing.

* * *

In a crowded Ten Forward Mann and Riker are at the centre table…

Riker: I think I might like Wesley as a friend.

Everyone stops.

Mann: GET HIM!

Everyone chases Riker.

* * *

Later in the Ready Room Picard confesses to Pinky.

Pinky: Oooooh. I see…

Picard: Forgive me.

Pinky: Well, fine... I'll think about it.

Picard goes up to the tank

Picard: Really? I promise I'll never use that delivery company again. Next time you want a rock, it'll get here on time.

* * *

In Troi's office, Troi's in her chair, a guy is on the couch…

Ensign Random: I need a vacation.

Troi: I really don't care.

Muffled voice: Yeah now get out!

Muffled Mann: I FOUND HIM! I FOUND THE WESLEY-LOVER! LET'S GET HIM!

* * *

Later in Ten Forward Mann and Guinan are sitting at a table

Mann: Picard doesn't like me.

Guinan: What gives you that idea?

Mann: Look at him over there at the bar, see what he's doing with those bottles and that smoke and exploding liquids? He keeps aiming arrows at me, and holding up test tubes, then smiling.

Guinan: I'll see what he's up to later. Now order a drink or get out. If you want a Counselor, go see Riker, then if he's ok, go see Troi.

Mann: You've done that?

Guinan: Yeah, well, by 'ok', I mean 'asleep'.

Riker suddenly appears at the table and his belly knocks Guinan's hat.

Riker: Grrrr…

Guinan: That's it. No more knocks against my giant hats!

Guinan pulls out a rifle…

Mann: WAIT! Setting number one gave me terrible intestinal problems for a week.

Guinan: Wait 'til you see setting number two...

Mann: Oh dear.

* * *

Later on the bridge everyone is at their stations. Mann is at the helm.

Riker gets up.

Riker: I'm sick of this bridge and everyone in it!

Picard pushes buttons on his chair.

Riker is then struck by something that looks like lightning.

Troi gets up.

Troi: What about me Will? Do you hate me?

Riker: Riker no hate Troi!

Riker picks up Troi and carries her off the bridge kicking and screaming, she is also kicking and screaming.

Mann: Well that was interesting.

Picard: Shush!

Data: That alien species must never be allowed to visit us again. Your feelings are too hostile.

Worf: You are a d*** head!

Picard: Better than being Dick Mann.

Mann grunts: That's it.

Mann pushes some buttons.

Computer: Warning!

Red Alert sounds.

Computer: All dwellings with feline occupants are now unlocked!

Picard and crew look in horror.

Picard: MANN!

Picard: YOU'RE A MAD MAN!

Mann: Mad Mann actually... Wait... WHAT HAVE I DONE?

Mann guards his face as thousands of cats leap at it hacking.

* * *

Later in the ready room Mann and Picard are standing opposite each other, cats of different colours are making loud noises and clawing up bin bags all around them.

Picard loudly: YOU'VE DONE IT THIS TIME MANN! THIS IS GOING TO TAKE FOREVER TO CLEAN UP!

Mann loudly: JUST MAKE WESLEY DO IT! HE DOESN'T SEEM TO SPEND MUCH TIME AT THE ACADEMY, HE'S ALWAYS HERE!

Data walks in with cats all over him clawing at him.

Data loudly: THERE ARE TOO MANY CATS TO COPE WITH.

Mann loudly: DATA, FIND SOMETHING TO LURE THE CATS AWAY LIKE A GIANT BIN BAG OR HAPPY WILD BIRD.

Picard loudly: AS LONG AS IT'S NOT MY FISH!

Computer loudly: WARNING! WARP CORE PLASMA OUTPUT JAMMED.

Comm: LAFORGE TO PICARD, THERE'S A MASSIVE HAIRBALL IN THE PRIMARY PLASMA TUBE! IF I CAN'T REMOVE IT, WHICH I WON'T EVEN TRY TO DO, THEN WE'RE GONNA BLOW!

Picard loudly: THIS IS INTOLLERABLE!

Computer loudly: WARNING, WARP CORE BREACH IN ONE MINUTE, TWO SECONDS.

Picard loudly: WELL, THERE'S NO CHOI…AAAA!

A cat dives at his face and pulls him under the table.

Mann pushes buttons on Picard's desk laptop.

Mann loudly: ALL HANDS, AND PEOPLE ATTACHED TO THEM, THIS IS LIEUTENANT COMMANDER MANN. ABANDON SHIP. THIS IS NOT A DRILL, A SAW, OR A SCREWDRIVER. IN FACT, WHEN IS IT EVER A DRILL?

Riker on the comm: PROCEED TO EMEGENCY ESCAPE PARDS!

Mann: That's all he ever says isn't it?

Data: Yes Mann. Now what should we do about the Captain?

Mann: He's done for!

Picard: No I'm not! Get this cat's genitals out of my face!

Mann stamps on the cat, it falls off Picard's face.

* * *

The three run to the tactical post on the bridge and try to separate the ship.

Mann: Controls not responding! There's a cat sleeping in the main Sep circuit! All I'm doing with these buttons is electrically shocking it!

Picard smiles and pushes the buttons several times.

Picard: Escape pods it is!

* * *

Five minutes later, the ship hasn't exploded. All escape pods are floating outside the ship.

Mann, Data, and Picard have one to themselves, the gravity isn't as heavy as it is on the ship, so every now and then they bob up and down floating.

Picard: Thanks a lot Mann. Can we go back aboard now…

Mann: Who locked the outer doors?

Picard: I did, to stop the cats getting off the ship.

Mann: And so stopped our escape pods getting us back in.

Data: Unfortunately I left my console unsecured, in the haste to deliver my report.

Picard and Mann show shock with wide white eyes.

Picard: When Spot jumps on your console in your office…

Mann: She sees you pushing buttons…

Picard: If that cat gets to the bridge then…

As Picard and Mann stare in horror out the window, the Enterprise warps away.

Mann: YOU IDIOT! SPOT HAS STOLEN THE ENTERPRISE!

* * *

Picard: How am I gonna report this to Starfleet?

Mann: Painfully. The Command in this sector is our favourite, Admiral Nacho.

Picard: NACHAYEV?

Mann: Yep.

Picard: You were in charge of the evacuation, it's your fault, you report it.

Mann: You were sampling sweet breads under a table, it's your fault!

Data just watches their misery with a look of amazement.

Mann: Ok, fine, access the transmitters on all pods, link them up so I can extend comm range and call Nacho.

That is done by Data. He and Picard sit behind Mann on the floor.

Mann: Here goes…

Mann pushes some buttons on a console.

Nacho appears on the screen above it.

Nacho: Starfleet. Mann? Why are you hunched up against the wall and ceiling?

Mann: I'm in a small, variable gravity escape pod.

Nacho: Why?

Mann: Admiral. I don't know how to report this…

Picard shouts from the background: It's his fault Admiral!

Nacho: Mann?

Mann: Sir, the Enterprise has been stolen…

Nacho: WHAT? WHO DID THIS?

Mann: ...Data's cat.

Nacho sits silently.

Mann: Admiral, we did all we could but Spot had been watching Data use his console, and since Data left his unlocked…

Nacho: Mann, so it's part Data's fault? Where was Picard?

Mann: Under a desk sampling some Feline based sausages and claws.

Nacho: Not to worry darl…Richard, Picard was the senior officer on duty, Data was the second officer, and you were a consultant of the two.

Mann: Yes Sir, I ordered evacuation when the ship almost suffered a core breach, though I was the one that let the cats out in the first place, under provocation.

Nacho: That's alright.

Mann: Sir?

Nacho (forgiving tone): Mann, it was a mistake, I read Troi's report on those emotional aliens. Since you did what you could, I can forgive you.

Picard feeling like he's no longer in trouble stands up and moves over to Mann

Picard: I can take it from here.

Mann moves.

Picard stands in front of the screen.

Picard: Admiral, as I was under stress…

Nacho (snappy): Put a sock in it Picard.

Data: A co…

Nacho: I'm well aware of what would be more fitting Mr Data.

Mann: I'll say.

Nacho: Well done there Mann. Nice comeback.

Picard: Ad…

Nacho: Picard! I'm sending a ship for you all, the only one available isn't even on paper yet…Intrepid class, newly imagined, still in pieces, don't screw it up, or else I'll have your…

Picard: Yes.

Nacho: On a plate. Now, use that ship to find the Enterprise with its advanced sensors, don't break it! …Goodbye Mann…Richard.

Mann: Bye Admiral.

Screen goes off.

Picard looks at Mann angrily.

Mann (arms folded): What? I can't help it if I'm charming, handsome, with a huge bulging... heart.

Comm: Troi to Picard. Riker needs restraining over on this pod.

Picard: Understood. Where are the thruster controls on this thing? Maybe we should ignore her and go to Beverley's pod instead... We could teach her how to operate it... Look out the window! It's upside down.

* * *

Captain's Log, the new USS Intrepid, arrived a few hours ago, it's quite different to the Enterprise, and the stations are in different places. This is an NX ship, prototype, but I've heard it has good sensors. All pods have been retrieved. We're ready to get underway, but Admiral Nacho is here also. Oh and by the way, I disagree with having the ready room on the right of the bridge!

* * *

On the bridge everyone is at their new stations. There is more grey space than on Voyager, less monitors... sort of like the Defiant when it was first introduced.

Picard comes from the ready room and sees Troi at the multipurpose station behind the command chairs.

Riker looks furious.

Picard: What's this?

Riker: No counselor's chair!

Picard: How about the science station?

Troi moves to sit at the side station.

Picard: Riker, isn't that my chair?

Riker: I've always sat on the right.

Picard: Ok.

Picard sits in the chair on the side closest to Ops.

Mann is at the helm.

Mann: Ready to get underway. This ship is in pieces... What's it doing so far away from the shipyards?

Nacho comes on to the bridge and stands by Mann.

Mann: Admiral.

Nacho: Shall we get going Mann?

Mann: We don't know where the Enterprise went yet.

Nacho: I didn't mean the Enterprise, tell me, is there a Mrs Mann yet?

Mann looks white wide eyed.

Picard smiles evilly.

Data scans for the Enterprise.

Data: Picking up warp trail, leading to the Polythite system.

Mann: What's there?

Nacho: A whole planet based on polythene and plastics…a culture built on what you would crudely call bin bags.

Mann: Those cats'll destroy them! Course laid in!

Picard: Engage!

Mann: Whoa… these nacelles look a bit funny.

Nacho: Yes, we're going to upgrade them sooner or later, but for now you're stuck with these things… and me.

Picard: Make it no!

Mann: Why was this ship even out here? It's nowhere near complete.

Nacho: I wanted it at my starbase for certain classified reasons…

Riker: I'll bet a romantic getaway cruise liner for use by you and Mann. Did he tell you he has nightmares about you?

Mann: No Commander, I have them about you.

* * *

Mann is in the mess hall later, on a table in the corner by the window and replicator.

Guinan comes over and sits.

Mann: Admiral Nacho is getting on my nerves.

Guinan: I see.

Mann: Not literally.

Guinan: Is it Data's fault, all this?

Mann: Most of it, yeah.

Guinan: This ship has no bar. No phaser range either.

Mann: Let's find a Holodeck and fire some phasers.

Guinan: Who needs a Holodeck?

Guinan pulls out a phaser.

Mann: I just remembered, I'm needed on the bridge.

* * *

Later on the bridge…

Mann: Entering the system Captain.

Picard: Red alert.

Worf: Aye.

The noise of Voyager's alert/Enterprise E alert sounds. The lights dim.

Everyone pulls a sour face.

Mann: You call that an alert?

Picard: I prefer the whooping.

Mann: Why did the lights go down? I can't see, bad light mixed with computer monitors is bad for the eyes! Ain't that right Geordi?

Worf: Who cares! There's the Enterprise above that planet. We need to capture it.

The back of the Enterprise is shown on screen near a brown planet.

Picard: I can't believe this, I never wanted to say this… Spot, this is Captain Picard, surrender my ship.

Comm: Mrrrow! HI-I-I-S-S-S-S-K-K-K!

Riker: Load torpedoes.

Picard: Then fire them!

The Intrepid fires at the Enterprise.

Worf: Their power systems are damaged but…they are still powering phasers!

Mann: They've seen us do it plenty of times.

The ship rattles.

Mann: Direct hit! They've knocked shields to eighty percent!

The Enterprise turns to face the Intrepid.

Then beeping sounds, the type that sounds like a ringing phone, a whirring.

Mann: They're firing photons!

A photon appears on the screen and then hits the ship.

The ship rattles and a few consoles, and the helm shoot sparks. Smoke appears.

Picard: Nice sensors, but the shields are shi…

The ship is hit again.

Mann: Incoming! Full spread this time!

Riker: That's five at once! ...Fo budget reasons. Isn't it supposed to be ten at once? Just kidding... Ha. Budget.

There's a massive crash, the ship shakes and all consoles spark and some displays go fuzzy, there are a few fires and smoke.

Mann: Shields at ten percent! Suggest we run away before we are liable to be blamed for something else.

Comm: Mrrow!

Data: That noise usually means 'give me something'. Perhaps surrender.

Picard: Wha?

The ship takes a phaser hit.

Another rattle and sparks.

Data: Multiple system failures, hull integrity is beginning to fail.

Nacho enters the bridge and steps to the command center.

Nacho: You're breaking the ship! It took ages to build!

Picard: It's full of design flaws anyway! And designer floors that are frankly inappropriate. I'm doing you a favour, Mister Worf, all phasers, fire!

Worf: No effect, power systems are down.

Everyone looks at LaForge at the Engineering console, and everyone else stands.

Mann runs over and removes the visor, Geordi is sleeping.

Nacho: DAMN! Incompetent fool!

Mann: We could transmit our command codes to disable the Enterprise.

Nacho: Well thought Mann!

Picard grumbles.

Riker runs around to the multipurpose console behind the command chairs and starts pushing buttons.

Riker: My codes don't work enough!

Riker looks up, and evil.

Riker: What are your codes?

Picard: I'm not telling YOU of all people. Last time I did that you... I'm not repeating it in polite company.

Picard runs to and leans down to the Command PADD between the command chairs. He pushes buttons.

Computer: Codes accepted.

Data: The Enterprise is offline.

Mann: Thank goodness.

Picard: You're welcome Mann.

Mann does a shifty eyes thing.

Mann checks LaForge's console.

Mann: The Enterprise beamed down several life forms before we disabled it.

Picard: We?

Mann: Our transporters are still online.

Picard: Myself, Mann, Data, will beam to the Enterprise, we will secure it, and then Riker, you can beam us to the surface.

Nacho: I'll join you.

Worf: This is intolerable! I get the worst lines, I don't even say that much, and now you're excluding me from the assignment I am supposed to do by job description!

Mann: Must be all that leaky smoky stuff messing with your head Worf… Lines? What next, scripts? Or even... BATHING?

Everyone laughs.

A guy walks in and passes Riker a pad of paper.

Riker reads: Let's get this over with.

The team stand in the command center, some yellow shirts come in through the door by Ops and go down to the team, and hand them some phaser rifles. The yellow shirts run off to empty and other consoles.

Picard: Set coordinates for Deck 36.

Riker pushes some buttons.

Picard: Energise.

The team beam out.

* * *

On the Enterprise in Engineering the four beam in.

The place is wrecked. Cables everywhere, open conduit boxes, smoking consoles, the Emergency door is down by the warp core. There are also cat hairs on the main console.

Picard looks at the hairs and pulls a disapproving face.

Mann and Data check consoles.

Mann: IDIOTS!

The other three look at Mann.

Picard: Well if we're that, you're a basta…

Mann: They hacked at the security wires, they tripped forcefields and now most of the cats are trapped.

Picard: Status of neuroxine systems?

Mann: More than enough.

Picard: Fill all trap areas with nine thousand billion CCs.

Data: That will kill the cats.

Picard: Good.

Mann: Erm…the system just crashed.

Data: We must reach the bridge and secure the ship.

* * *

They get to the bridge by climbing up the lift shaft and force the door open. They come out in a corridor near the Obs lounger. They go through it to the bridge, which is ruined as well. There are cat hairs and flickering consoles, are signs that things have been used as scratch posts.

Picard: MY CHAIR! He runs down to the chair which is full of claw marks and has foam coming out of it.

Nacho checks the helm, Data checks the science stations, Mann stumbles over a beam and gets to the Engineering station.

Mann: That hairball, the cats demanded full warp, so more plasma was sent into the tube where the hairball was, some of it was dissolved, the rest was pushed into the warp core and vapourised or went through to the nacelles and clogged them with cat hairs.

Picard: Data! That's the sort of thing you're supposed to do!

Data: Clog the nacelles?

Picard: G-NO! GNO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O! (a console explodes). I meant handle the technobabble, Mann's not so good with it today.

Data: According to this the cats have exhausted the supply of bin bags, and beamed to the planet near a large polythene structure.

Mann: How did they rip up 4.5 billion bin bags?

Picard gets up from crouching by his chair and goes over to Mann

Picard: Secure the ship, then we'll beam to the surface.

Mann locks out the controls.

Picard suddenly remembers his fish and runs into the ready room.

Mann shouts: CAPTAIN?

Picard shouts: I HAVE TO COMFORT PINKY, WAIT A MINUTE...

Picard distant: I DIDN'T MEAN TO FORGET ABOUT YOU! I AM SO SORRY! PL-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E...

Mann checks his watch.

Picard distant: -E-E-E-E-E-E-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-S-S-S-SE! FOR-GIVE ME-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E!

Nacho folds her arms.

Nacho: For goodness sake, just get us down there Mann.

Mann taps his badge

Mann: Mann to Riker, start beaming over away teams to fix the ship, and prepare to beam four to the planet surface.

Comm: Acknowledged, standing by... And who made you the Captain?

Picard walks up and speaks loudly

Picard: Commander Riker, have someone kind care for Pinky…Energise.

Riker: How about Ensigns Youngs and Birdseye?

Picard: NO WAY ARE YOU PUTTING PINKY IN THE HANDS OF FISHMONGERS! SEND SOMEONE NICE!

Nacho: Yes, like me.

The others shiver.

* * *

The four beam to the planet. They see what looks like a huge series of giant ripped circus tents made of black bin bag material. Faint cat noises are audible. The planet is dull, pinkish grey, rocky, not quite sunny.

Picard looks astonished. Data looks blank, Nacho looks at Mann, Mann looks as if he's about to face a difficult challenge.

Mann and Data pull out tricorders.

Mann: Where's Spot?

Data: In the structure.

Mann (like an Action Man): Let's get this done. (And it's Action Mann actually).

Mann and Picard raise their rifles. Data looks confused.

Nacho: I left my rifle on the ship.

Data: I never use one, just a phaser.

Mann puts on a Troi voice: And you never will…who-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o. I can sense things… Including nothing… Don't come near me or Will will kill you... who-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o... I sense a tight costume that makes me look stupid...

Picard taps his badge

Picard: Riker, beam down a rifle for Nachayev.

Nacho is beamed a rifle and the three stand posing.

Data: I have a rifle, I neglected to mention that. I only mentioned that I used phasers. Theoretically my...

Mann: Use it.

Data: I cannot shoot my cat.

Picard: No one asked you to.

Mann: Actually you can, if you press the… oh never mind, I know you only let Geordi press your android rifle buttons... HEY! I just thought! This is discrimination by colour!

Nacho: How is that Mister Mann?

Mann: Data's the only yellow shirt, and the only albino. Nacho is the only woman.

Picard: Questionable.

(RIFLE SHOT)

Picard: Watch my boot! You old one.

Nacho frowns at Picard... and aims again.

Picard: Nacho is the only one with peroxide.

Mann: That hair's quite natural.

Nacho smiles.

Picard pulls a disgusted face.

Data: As historica…

Picard: Data, don't ruin the phrase, just say it…oh I'll do it. GET A ROOM!

* * *

The four eventually walk over to the structure, there are cats everywhere, and aliens being hacked at or hiding under tables.

Mann: They look like Tellarites.

Nacho: They are distant relatives.

Picard: Yeah like me and Mann.

Data and Nacho look at Picard and Mann.

Nacho looks shocked.

Nacho: Oh my…you do look similar.

Picard: Don't you understand sarcasm?

Mann: He was joking…I hope.

Picard: Let's shoot some cats!

Data: Why are you enjoying the process of injuring innocent life forms?

Mann: Who said they were innocent?

Picard: Yeah...

* * *

They all split up and rifle various cats who have crazed eyes and large claws.

Picard has a grumpy face and shoots one off a table who rips the table cloth as it falls.

Data shoots two who are running at him.

Nacho shoots a building ceiling support which lands on a cat and knocks it out.

Mann shoots three cats.

Mann: Is this a banquet hall? Tables, cloths and flags everywhere.

Spot steps in front of Mann.

Mann looks.

Mann: She's crazed!

Spot's eyes are in yellow rings and she's drooling.

Mann: It's crazy, it must have eaten some of the alien food!

Spot dives at Mann before he can react.

Picard notices and shoots across the room at Spot who hovers in mid-air and looks jagged. When the beam terminates, Spot just falls on the floor and it's eyes roll around in circles.

Mann: Let's make sure this thing is sedated.

Picard, Mann, Nacho advance on Spot and start blasting.

Data: She is incapacitated now. You may stop firing... Sirs... You may stop firing now... Repeatedly firing is not necessary...

* * *

Captain's Log, the Enterprise and Intrepid have been repaired, the bin bag planet has been given some new bin bag material, the cats have been stopped and treated for food poisoning, and Spot is taking special treatment…

* * *

Mann is in a corridor facing a wall. He holds Spot by the neck and quickly rotates his hand, Spot's rear end spins and whacks the wall repeatedly. Mann is literally spinning and swinging a cat.

Data walks over.

Data: Mann…

Mann (still attacking the cat): Data, we talked about this, I have to do this. Captain's orders.

Data: I still protest, however I am here to tell you it is Worf's turn to punish Spot.

Mann: Oh, ok.

Worf walks up from behind Data and takes over from Mann.

Mann walks with Data down a joining corridor. Sounds of Spot Mrow-ing and wall smacks are still audiable.

Mann: Data, we need a cat deterrent.

Data: Why do you dislike cats so much?

Mann: They rip bin bags and make a mess, they kill birds and small animals for no reason. The cat vermin species is over populated. They're mean. They look at humans like I look at sh*t. Cats don't rule me, or have rule over my property. They look at me like I've defied their divine rule. I hate them. At Starfleet Academy, I rigged a transporter to beam half of the cat population of San Francisco into the sea.

Data: Did they die?

Mann: NO, unfortunately. I just wanted to teach them a lesson. Some git, idiot noticed and redirected the transporter.

Data: I recall a similar incident several years ago. Was your access code 'JR819'?

Mann: Yes.

Data: Then I am the git, idiot, who foiled you.

Mann laughing: Robot man foiled me! HA!

Data: Because I am made of metals? I see. as for cats. I believe killing is wrong.

Mann: But the small cute animals would suffer because of them!

Data: Animals such as rodentia?

Mann: Is that even a word?

Data: It is if I use it.

Mann: I just hope Spot never has kittens.

* * *

A session with Counselor Troi.

Troi is in her chair, Data is on the couch. Riker is in a hidey hole behind one of the walls.

Troi: Why did you protest to Spot's punishment?

Data: I was concerned for animal welfare, I do not share people's love for killing animals senselessly. It is criminal.

Troi: Even with cats?

Data: There must be some limits.

Muffled voice: You're right. Data, lift your eyes, hers are on her face.

Data looks at the wall.

Data: Commander, would you care to sit with me? I did make it clear I did not mind you sitting in. And I am looking down and copying misery. I was not threatening your dominance over the Counsellor.

Muffled voice: Shut it. I'd prefer to spy secretly.

Data: This situation is unusual.

Troi: Not for my patients.

Muffled voice: Shush you!

Data: Commander, leave her alone. Your actions are unprofessional.

BURRRRP!

Riker's belly knocks a hole in the wall which he then bursts through.

Riker runs at Data, Data pushes Riker who falls back into the wall hole. Riker storms back out, picks up Troi, and walks out.

Data: Strange.

Comm:Troi to Data, he's out of breath, he's too fat, he had to place me in a doorway. Would you like to continue the session?

Data: No thank you, you have provided sufficient help.

Data mutters: Crusher is probably better than you at helping people... and as Mann would say, she is an idiot.

* * *

No fish were harmed in the making of this log entry, several cats were stunned by phaser fire, and Spot had a sore backside for a while. Mann's wrist ached, but he thinks it was worth it.


End file.
